What you are

So I have been told two things this week that were not meant to hurt my feelings, but really did and the source of them, kind of made it hurt even more. First of all let me start by saying that when I was little, I was always make fun of for being a “chubby girl” in elementary school, middle school and by my brothers all the time, I have always had some body image issues from that. Earlier this week my dad’s girlfriend told me not trying to be mean, but she said " You need to eat real food you can’t just eat salad all the time, you are never going to be a size zero, you are a good size now, and you are healthy" well of course the only thing to me, that stuck out was the "your never going to be a size zero", and for me as the "chubby girl" it really hurt my feelings. I don't want to be a size zero, but its hurtful for someone to tell me that my body does not have the capability of ever being a zero. This is the other thing that someone told me "Anastasia I can’t wait till you have a boyfriend and get married you are going to be the cutest girlfriend and wife ever, sending little notes, and doing the sweetest things. I can picture you with someone who is so nice and loves the lord but is not that attractive" WHAT!!! I thought to myself as I heard the last sentence come out. Now I truly do find hearts more attractive than any physical attribute, and a love for the lord is the most attractive thing that someone could possibly possess. However, when I heard this I just thought, why on earth would she say that? Am I not pretty? Would someone attractive ever like me? I was really hurt. Now that I have thought about both of these for a few days, and I have made a valuable discovery. My discovery came from a children's book, in the words of Dr. Seuss, "Today you are you! That is truer then true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!" I love this I am who I am, there is no one else like me in the whole world, God made me Unique, and Great. Sometimes it is so easy to get caught up in all of the negative things about you. and completely forget about all of the wonderful things that make you, you. Maybe I will never be a size Zero, but I would rather be a beautiful person on the inside, then be beautiful on the outside with an ugly inside. I am with me more than anyone else, and if I don't like who I am on the inside then what is the point of having a beautiful surface. There are so many things on earth that don't make sense if there is nothing inside, for example I am sure you have seen the shadow boxes with the dead butterflies. Well you can look at one of those and think wow that is really pretty but then you see a real butterfly dancing through the sky and it can take your breath away. Even a car if it is beautiful on the outside but you turn it on and it sounds like a dirt bike and the engine is broken well then it really is worthless. So I would much rather be beautiful on the inside first! As for having a boyfriend/husband who is not attractive, I know when the time comes that it will not matter what he looks like, because his inside is going to be beautiful! Beauty on the outside fades but I want a true love, someone who knows how to love me because they first loved God, and who is going to treat me the way I should be treated, and no matter what anyone thinks I know that I will find him to be the most attractive man alive, because God knows what I need in a husband one day and he will create all that I need to be the wife he has created me to be. So all this to say, Be YOU! "Today you are you! That is Truer than True! There is no one alive who is you-er than you" be yourself, and be it proud, don't strive to be just like someone else, be the best possible you that you can be! :-)